Posted on: 4 August 2015
Giving up a baby for adoption can be a wrenching decision because you might want to keep the baby or feel connected to the baby even if you don't have the money or lifestyle that would allow a child to get the care that it needs. As a result, even if you are certain that you made the right decision, you might have some grief over having to give up your child. Here are some ways to help you handle the grief.
1. Avoid Rumination
One of the easiest ways to make an unpleasant feeling unmanageable is to think about it all the time and allow it to grind in your mind. If you do this over the grief that you feel about giving up your child for adoption, then you will make yourself feel worse. Right after you give up your baby, your emotions will be very strong and it will be difficult to keep from ruminating. When you are working, trying to fall asleep, or doing chores, try to distract yourself whenever you start thinking about your grief for more than a few minutes. Listen to podcasts or music, have a movie on in the background, or call a friend. Just don't dwell on your feelings.
However, you will need to process your grief in order to continue to function. In order to allow yourself to have these thoughts for a healthy amount of time, allow yourself to think about your grief for a specific amount of time. Set a timer for twenty or thirty minutes each day and allow yourself to pour out your emotions into a journal. This will help you process your emotions without ruminating.
3. Talk to Others
There are support groups all over the U.S. that provide places for women who have given up their babies to process their grief. Talking to other people in person or even on online forums will allow you to remember that you are not alone in this experience and that many other women have gone through this process. By talking to other people regularly, you might even be able to meet women who are a few months or a year past giving their babies up. You will be able to talk to them and see how the grief fades to a manageable level over time, which might be able to give you hope.
For more information, talk to the center like A Child's Dream.Share